It you are like me then you have resolved many things and started many projects without following through on them. This is a habit that most of us get into. We decide to quit smoking or swearing or to get up one hour earlier in the morning and go to the gym. But sooner rather than later our determination flags. We lapse back into our old habits and put off these goals for some future date.
The habit of following through on our decisions, being true to our resolve and making them work is perhaps the quality that is prized most in our day and age. People respect the person who resolves to do something and then makes it happen. It is a habit that will help you in your career and in your personal life. You will be more respected by people.
In general people do not respect a person very much who is weak – no matter what his other qualities may be. If you are not able to consistently produce results, others will find it difficult to trust you and you will not believe yourself to be deserving of success of any kind.
It goes without saying that you will not achieve your goals or succeed in your projects unless you form this habit. These are the benefits of building resolve.
The picture I have of a resolute person is summarized by Rudyard Kipling in his immortal poem – If:
If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you;
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
But make allowance for their doubting too;
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or, being lied about, don’t deal in lies,
Or, being hated, don’t give way to hating,
And yet don’t look too good, nor talk too wise;If you can dream – and not make dreams your master;
If you can think – and not make thoughts your aim;
If you can meet with triumph and disaster
And treat those two imposters just the same;
If you can bear to hear the truth you’ve spoken
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to broken,
And stoop and build ‘em up with wornout tools;If you can make one heap of all your winnings
And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings
And never breath a word about your loss;
If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says to them: “Hold on”;If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
Or walk with kings – nor lose the common touch;
If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you;
If all men count with you, but none too much;
If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds’ worth of distance run -
Yours is the Earth and everything that’s in it,
And – which is more – you’ll be a Man my son!
Normally when we think of a person with resolve or if we picture ourselves as acting with determination we think of a person with gritted teeth who is determined to succeed and have his way no matter what. However such a person is I think mostly driven by fear or greed or at the very least by the ego, You may succeed if you have this attitude but it is tense and strenuous and you will not enjoy the journey very much. And for most of us, maintaining this attitude and this amount of tension is not something that we can do habitually.
How then are we to build resolve?
In Hindu mythology we picture the Universe to be God’s Lila. God created this world and he keeps it in motion almost light heartedly without effort of any kind. There is no attitude life of “I must have my way.” And if we believe in the Divinity within us it should be possible for us also to run our lives in the same way – without effort, almost light heartedly, able to take both triumph and disaster with the same unmoved spirit. This is my conception of resolve.
This state of mind can be attained and made habitual through eastern philosophy. I would recommend that you take up good meditation practice seriously.
The state of mind or the insight that I am aiming for through meditation is that our body, mind and intellect that we consider to be ourselves is not really our true selves. Also the body–mind–intellect or the BMI that we so identity ourselves with is changing all the time and is impermanent.
Our bodies are not the some as they were 20 years, back. Nor are our minds. They are processes that change from moment to moment. Buddhist philosophy assures us that nowhere in the BMI is there to be found a fixed unchanging self. This is the Buddhist concept of egolessness and is one of the main concepts of Buddhism.
So if we learn to dis-identify from the BMI we can gain an insight that can totally transform our lives. Specifically in this case, to form the habit of resolve – we must learn to dis-identity from the mind . The mind with its hopes and fears and habitual responses to situations, both internal and external keeps us imprisoned in our habits and way of life and we cannot break free of them. Whereas if we could simply observe them it would help to build resolve.
Let me describe the state of mind or the insight that sometimes comes to me as a result of meditation. Since the BMI is impermanent and is not the true self I do not need to take the antics of the mind seriously. I can simply observe it without reacting.
Since there is nothing that I can do to preserve the BMI beyond its allotted lifespan I do not need to change my mind in any way. I can surrender to the thoughts and feelings that arise without reacting to them, and with a feeling of equanimity and well being. I can simply witness them without being disturbed. This habit goes a long way in building resolve.
This means that I need not take my fears or complexes of the mind seriously. I can just watch my thoughts float by as they will without bothering with them. Osho Rajneesh says that we should set into the habit of observing the antics of the mind with indifference. I sometimes find myself doing so and I hope to progress further in my practice.
How does this help in being resolute? Well suppose you have made a financial plan and are worried about whether you can make it work. You need not take your doubts and fears seriously. You can simply witness them without reacting and they will pass.
Suppose you develop a craving to splurge on something that you know does not fit in with your financial plan. You need not give in to the craving. Simply witness it, dis-identity and it will pass.
This applies to any and all resolutions that you choose to make. Suppose you resolve to quit smoking. You are doubtful whether you will succeed. You remember the many failed attempts in the past. You fear the withdrawal symptoms and wonder whether you will be able to enjoy life without cigarettes.
All of these are habitual responses of the mind. This is the mind working overtime and in a way that does not benefit you. But if you have the habit of witnessing without reacting you need not take any of this seriously. Simply surrender to these thoughts, observe them with indifference and they will pass.
Meditation stresses knowledge of impermanence. If you develop some understanding of impermanence you will certainly travel some way to being able to meet with triumph and disaster and treat those to imposters just the same. It will help you dis-identify and witness the antics of the mind. This will help to build resolve.
But the important thing is the habit of witnessing. Just about any meditation practice will help you to form this habit. The important thing is to take up the practice and be regular.
In forming the habit of the observing your thoughts and feelings, remember the following :
1. Observe without reacting – This is what is taught in various forms of meditation and it has many uses from moment to moment in our lives.
2. Surrender to the antics of the mind – In the Bible it is said, “Lord, let your will and not mine be done.” We need some of this attitude of surrender when we are observing the mind and doing our meditation practice.
3. Do not turn yourself into a battlefield. All that happens both within and without you is – if you like – a manifestation of God. In observing our internal state we are not working to change them. We are not reacting with our likes and dislikes. We are simply observing. This is the way to grow spiritually and transform yourself.
So take up regular meditation practice. By a making the effort to meditate regularly our willpower will benefit as a result.
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